I am 51, so my birthday this year makes me 52. Making my racing age for cross 53. I like that in two years I'll race 55+. I still plan on making it into the top 10 of the 45+ this year.
I imagined how stupid I looked. I weigh 156, dress in my kit, riding my bike.
Sitting up with my hands off the bars. Flipping the bird with my left hand.
I think he would of shot me if I said a word. I do. I just looked at him. His fast moving expressions of that old face, probably the same age of me, 51. Black skinned, muscled under, a done wrong, make it his world right, face.
I don't like trouble, I've never been in a fight. None. Despite all the punk rock days and my obnoxious mouth.
The hard people who live the fuck outta life, that will in a moment risk it all, they are the ones who are the most afraid to die, that don't want to die. Its not like you could go to a mental health center. Head to the suicide ward, and ask those locked inside, "who'd, which on of uses' want to make your family proud? This is no easy one, and you will most likely get killed, but we need you to go and assassinate the Socialist President of this small South American country to keep the USA safe."
More of the hard ones are lost.
and the soft ones, are afraid to live, or don't know how. The census, last taken, concluded that a lot of them go into television journalism. That the, most soft, go into talking about the weather. Meteorologist.
It waited for me on the other end of it.
"Asshole" he said.
"what the fuck, you want to die? you give me the finger?" He looked into my eyes.
"Fuck you" He said to me. and he was off.
Au contraire mon fraire.
Patti Smith - "Summer Cannibal"
The other day, I road out in the 34 degree rain. I don't know why but I stayed warmed. I headed home lucky not to go down on ice.
When I ride, I, am the king of the world.
I don't want to die. I do want to give you the finger. I shall in the future totally abstain, refrain, and concentrate on spinning my pedals, enjoying the air, sky, life.
Really I want to ride like a Summer Cannibal.
"the street beneath my feet descending into hell" patti smith